Maggie Gotz

Funny, I always had a feeling that something was not right with Maggie (I think this is what they call
woman’s intuition).  From the time she was in pre-school, she always cried when she left me
whether it was being left at a birthday party or dropping her off at grandma/grandpa’s house.  We
could never really pin point what made her cry and because of her age, she was never able to
verbalize what was wrong.  Now when I look back, I think maybe her blood sugar was off and it was
making her feel horrible.  Who wants to be left somewhere when you are not feeling well?  I
remember asking the doctor if her behavior was “normal” and of course I got the usual she will grow
out of it speech.  

Then December 5, 2005 came, she was half way through kindergarten and she was still crying.  I
remember it like yesterday, the doctor saying…I need to send you over to Children’s Hospital, she
has ketones in her urine and it looks like she might be diabetic. Somehow the world seemed to keep
moving as I was standing cold stone still, everything became a blur until I saw Jeremie (my husband)
at the hospital entrance.  Our time there was overwhelmingly long.  When we all got home, I think
my head hit my pillow at about 1:00am and by 7:00am we were back at Children’s Hospital in the
Diabetic clinic awaiting our first of many classes.  We were so beside ourselves that day.  I fought
back tears most of the day.  I think the worst thing that happened that day was that we were sent
home with so much information and then we had to apply it to Maggie.  There was not time to “just
have a minute” I remember having to hold her down by her ankles and hands so we could give her
the first injection.  What an awful feeling to know this is life or death now.  Life as we knew it has
changed.  All that kept running through my head was WHY?  Why us?  Why Maggie?  WHY?  WHY?  
WHY?  At this point, I could have probably dealt with cancer as a better outcome, at least there is an
end or you go into remission.  I have come to the conclusion that Diabetes is the most ruthless
disease there is.  It never stops.  

Well, it has been almost 6 years since Maggie was diagnosed and life does get better.  It does get
back to “normal”.  But it is just a different kind of normal now.  Maggie made the transition to a
pump about 3 years ago and that helped a lot.  She is working everyday to become independent.  
Because of how she deals with things, she has had anxiety.  We are not sure if being diabetic had
anything to do with bringing this out.  Trying to raise a child with diabetes is no different than
raising one that is not diabetic, but try and tell that to a “mom” who just gave you the glazed over
look when you are trying to drop off your diabetic kid at their house for a play date and the look in
their eyes says OMG do I have to give her a shot?  You know the look…it’s the same one you gave
the doctor after they told you your child was diabetic.  Life does change but it did before you had a
diabetic in your house to take care of too.  So after reading my story, hopefully you’re not feeling
like the “only one”.  You are NOT alone.  There are lots of us out there in the same situation, just at
different stages.  To me that has been the silver lining.  I have met so many people and more than
likely would not have gotten to know them if it weren’t for diabetes.  As for December 5, we now
celebrate the date.  I still don’t know WHY, but all I do know is that Life goes on.  

                                                                                                           - Karen (and Jeremie) Gotz
Sophia's Promise, Inc. - S75W14240 Restfull Lane - Muskego, WI  53150